Sneak Peek: Is It Cursed?
There are some pieces I regret picking up.
The reasons for this regret vary. Perhaps a piece tests positive for lead paint. Perhaps its damage is more extensive than I first believed. Perhaps there’s something about is that is stumping me artistically.
Or perhaps…I’m afraid of it.
That last one isn’t too common. In fact, I believe that so far, it’s only happened to me once. That one time is this time, and the piece is this piece.
This is an antique Arts and Crafts era console table I picked up for free. It’s old. Most likely pre-1890’s, as it appears to have hand-cut dovetail drawer joinery.
I’m sure you’re wondering how on earth a (usually) sane, rational human such as your friendly neighborhood Furniture Fabler could ever feel afraid of a table, and hey, that’s a fair question.
Is it because this is the first piece EVER in her Furniture Fabling history in which she has not been able to remove a piece’s pulls? AND that any and all recordings of her attempts to remove said pulls are mysteriously missing from her camera??
Nah, that didn’t throw me. Cameras can act up. And being stumped by a pull – well, that was bound to happen eventually.
Is it because this piece was nearly drowned in a thick red stain AND left unsealed in areas, causing any interaction with it to leave our Furniture Fabler’s hands covered so shockingly in red she began quoting Lady Macbeth??
Nope, I can handle that. I’m a theater geek after all, so I love drama. And I’m a mom of three, so I’ve been covered in worse. Bring it.
Is it because that extremely red stain is currently colorizing the sunshine-beaming-onto-a-wheat-field-carved-motif in a creepily eerie way??
Yep, that’s it.
I know, I know… this sounds nuts, but hear me out.
Sunshine = good.
Flora = good.
Sunshine and flora drenched in red = BAD.
There’s something so incongruent about it to me. It doesn’t fit. It grates. And that discord, for some reason, feels not simply out of alignment, but malevolent. Not awkward, not clumsy…bad. Dark. Like looking at a sunny day through a red visor. It just kind of goes Rosemary’s-Baby-meets-Children-of-the-Corn for me.
And so this poor (semi-villainous) console table sat, tucked waaaaaay in the back of the Furniture Fables storage area for months as I tried to work up the courage to face it. Not surprisingly, it was our first bright, sunny spring morning when my courage finally plucked up and I said to John, “would you please help me get out that creepily evil table?”
John understands my brain so he didn’t waste any time by asking silly questions like “what do you mean by ‘creepily-evil table’ or “should I be concerned about you?” and instead wrestled it out of storage and then patiently listened as I expounded on and on about how this table was so obviously cursed.
After my soliloquy, he gave me a pat on the back, and said, “Well, call me if you feel your soul is under attack. Good luck!” and went back inside to his office. People who work desk jobs, am I right??
Like any good Jedi, I did a quick meditation to center myself, double checked that my lightsaber was in good working order (ya know, just in case) and then bravely rolled up my robe sleeves and began to try and teach the good ways of the Force to Darth Sideboard.
Its makeover (exorcism) is not going to be for the weak of heart friends, and I should warn you to be ready for an extreme before and after moment, perhaps one that even invites some controversy! I hope you’ll join me for its surprising story as I face my fears and with some luck emerge with no longer a foe, but a new friend. Both of us stronger and brighter than ever…(fingers crossed).
Wish me luck!
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No wonder it’s fighting you friend, that color is well, hideous! I’m sure you will find a way to make it beautiful though. I always trust your process!
Girl, this piece sounds haunted to me lol
Say a prayer, brush with sage, and get the “red” out! I have confidence in your ability to bring light out of the darkness.
Oh how I can’t wait to see the newly emerged piece. I have a vision of what your transformation may look like with your subtle hints and now I eagerly look forward to see how close I am to your vision!